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改卷老师眼中的优秀英语作文-- 写作指导(二)
2015-11-12 10:59:29   来源:    点击:
                                                广东梅县东山中学         曾梓强

To many people even the word “work” sounds unpleasant ,not necessarily because they are lazy. The same man, who dislikes his job in the factory or even in the office ,may work hard at the weekend ,painting the house or digging the garden.
What is the reason ,then ?In most cases ,it is because these people simply do not enjoy the job they are doing .It does not give them any real satisfaction .It may be quite easy ,like making up wooden boxes ,but it is very boring. Very often they are doing a job which is just a small part of a much larger one ,such as attaching a door handle to a car .But the part they play in actually making the car is so small that they can never say :I have made something !
Yet in modern society somebody has to do ordinary jobs such as cleaning streets because this is the way society is organized. No matter how ordinary a job is, it plays a part in society and therefore deserves our due respect. Society cannot function a single day without the “dull and boring” jobs.
1、 以约30个词概括上文的主要内容。 
写作要求  1.作文中可以使用亲身经历或虚构的故事,也可以参照阅读材料的内容,但不得直接 引用原文中的句子。
2. 作文中不能出现真实姓名和学校名称。 
评分标准: 概括准确,语言规范,内容合适,语篇连贯。

题号 平均分 标准差 难度 区分度
52 10.86 6.30 0.43 0.91
 In the passage, the author mainly stresses the importance of small and ordinary work, such as cleaning the street. Because of their essentiality for the organization of the society, he thinks those doing such jobs should be respected greatly.
There is no doubt that what a cleaner does is harder compared with any other jobs in the society. On one hand, they must get up in the early morning every day to clean the street while we are still in the sweet sleeping dreams. On the other hand, they also suffer from less respect and lower pay, working all day on the street no matter it is sun shines strongly or snow, wind heavily.
Nobody could imagine what a bad environment we would live in if there were no cleaners in the city. Wherever we go, there is rubbish. Maybe we would soon be drowned in the mountain of rubbish. Ever worse, if there were no change about that, disease would spread at a very quick speed. Is there anything that can be worse than this!  
From the above, I can draw the conclusion safely that even the smallest and the most ordinary job, such as cleaning the street, is also the necessary part to keep the society going smoothly. Consequently, those who do those most insignificant jobs should get respect as much as those being engineers or teachers.
Oseola McCarty spent more than 75 years washing and ironing other people’s clothes. As a laundrywoman, she was paid only a few dollars each time. Certainly nobody would consider her rich, so they were all amazed when Miss McCarty decided to donate $ 150,000 to the University of Southern Mississippi.
The money was all her life savings. She could save such a large amount of money because she lived a very simple life. She never learned to drive, and when she wanted to go somewhere, she just walked. She never flew to anywhere till the donation(捐助),and in 50 years she had been out of the South only once. The house in which she lived was also a rather modest one her last uncle left her. Only after she became known in America did she begin to travel all over the country. Since then, she had been the subject of many interviews and articles and was even invited to the White House.
Her donation was for students who clearly needed financial help. She herself left school in the sixth grade and had never married or had children. She said to the reporters that the idea of helping somebody’s child go to college gave her much pleasure.

2、用约120个词就Miss McCarty的捐助谈谈你的想法,内容包括:
测量目标:主要考查考生的思维概括能力和语言表达能力,要求考生根据给出的英语材料,结合自己的理解,写一篇关于对Miss McCarty捐助行为的议论文。
试题分析:1、文体:议论文;2、时态:一般现在时;3、主题:描述Miss McCarty捐助行为,然后表达自己的想法。
Oseola McCarty, who was a laundrywoman for more than 75 years. She  earned a few dollars each time. But she donated $150,000 which was her life savings to help the students who needed financial help.
I think her behavior of donating money is worth praising and very unselfish. Everyone should help others in need. But how much to donate should be based on our actual situation. Although Oscola McCarty was not rich,she donated all her savings, and there-fore, those who needed help could obtain her financial support. This is what we should learn from her.
From my respective, her selfless donation has a great impact on those students who are favored. The $150,000 is very helpful to the students who have financial problems. They can buy many things they need as other students. And they may be more grateful and kinder. Therefore, it’s more likely for them to help others in the future.
If I am going to give donations, I will choose students too. They are in the most important period in their life. They need to get a long education. They have to buy a lot of books, pencil-cases, pens, erasers and so on, which will certainly cost a lot. They are growing up rapidly, which needs a lot of nutrition. If they don’t have enough money, they can’t eat enough food and take in enough energy. In a word, money is very important to students.(189 words)
 “When should I begin to acquire good habits?”a young boy asked his teacher.
   “How old are you?” asked the teacher.
   “Eight years old, sir.”answered the boy.
   “Then you have just lost eight years,” the teacher replied.
    There is no doubt that habits are formed at a very early age. When one is young, it is easy to acquire good habits.
    Good habits are practices that help us in our daily life. The habit of brushing one’s teeth in the morning, for instance, keeps one’s teeth clean and prevents a bad smell which is unpleasant to others. Bad habits such as sticking one’s tongue out, biting one’s fingernails and picking one’s nose, are undesirable ways of behaving in front of others. If we want people to enjoy being with us, we should try to develop habits that are pleasant.
It is said, “We sow an act; we reap a habit. We sow a habit and we reap a character.” The habits we formed at an early age shape our character. Habits are like tributaries(支流) which flow into a river. The river is made up of all its tributaries; a person’s character is made up of all the habits that he or she has acquired over the years.
1.   以约30个词概括本文内容;
2.   以约120个词谈谈你对好习惯养成的看法,并包括以下要点:
    1. 作文中可以使用亲身经历或虚构的故事,也可以参照阅读材料的内容,但不得直接引用原文的句子。
    2. 作文中不得出现真实姓名和学校名称。
读写任务:(One possible version)
The author tells us that habits are formed when we are young and we should try to develop good habits, for they benefit us in our daily life and help us shape our character.
   I can’t agree with the author more that it is of great significance to form a good habit. Cultivating a good habit can not only shape our character, increase our inner beauty but also influence those people around you.
   As for me, I have a lot of good habits like getting up early to speak English aloud, and reviewing and previewing lessons before going to bed every day, which have a great impact on my study and daily life In the past, I didn’t dare to speak English before others because of my poor pronunciation and I also did badly in my English tests. Thanks to my good habits, however, I have been making progress in my English study. Now I am proud of my speaking and writing in English.
    Here are some solutions to the problem of how to form a good habit. First of all, you should be determined to fight against your laziness. Once you make up your mind to do something, never give up easily. Then, you have to be confident, believing that you can become a better person. Last but not least, keep urging yourself. It may take a long period for you to form a good habit but remember it is perseverance that makes you successful!

汉语意思 常用词汇 高级词汇
采用 use adopt
使用 use make use of; take advantage of; make the best of
参观 visit pay a visit to; go to… for a visit
相信 believe that … hold the belief that...; be greatly convinced that…
发生 happen (vi) hit (some place) (vt.); take place
应该 should be supposed to
想到 sb think of sth sth occur to/ strike sb; come up with sth
建议 suggest that … put forward the suggestion that …
促成;导致 cause contribute to; lead to; result in
照顾 look after / take care of tend to
提高 Improve promote; strengthen
把时间用于 spend (all his spare time) in/on devote (all his spare time) to…
向某人道歉 apologize to sb make an apology to sb
决定/决心做某事 decide to do sth be determined to do sth
面对;面临 face be faced/ confronted with
位于 be in; lie in (/on/near) be located in; be situated in (/on/near)
知道;意识到 know be aware of/that; come to realize
同意某人观点 agree with sb share the same idea with sb
对……满意 be satisfied with express one’s satisfaction with
对……有兴趣 be interested in be crazy about; show great interest in
对……生气 be angry with be annoyed with
忙于…… be busy with be occupied with; bury oneself in
重视 pay attention to attach great importance to
试图做某事 try one’s best to do sth attempt / seek to do sth
由……组成 be made up of consist of
擅于;精通 be good at have a good command of; be familiar with
一……就 as soon as on (sth. /doing sth;)
走(一段路程) walk /travel (30 miles) cover(30 miles)
普通的 ordinary average
有益的 good beneficial
严重的 serious severe
重要的 (be) important (be) of great importance / significance
重要的 important essential; significant; vital
富裕的 rich wealthy
许多的 many numerous; a large number of
惊人的 surprising amazing; extraordinary
大多数的 most the majority of
累的;精疲力竭 (be) tired (be) worn out; (be) exhausted
各种各样的(书) all kinds of (books) a wide variety of (books)
有时 sometimes occasionally
非常 very extremely
最后;终于 finally eventually
立即;马上 immediately without hesitation; without delay
突然 suddenly all of a sudden
事实上 in fact as a matter of fact
在……期间 during in the course of
因为 because for the reason that
越来越多的人 more and more people an increasing/ growing number of people
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